Withnail: Withnail: I've got a bastard behind the eyes. Those are the kind of windows faces look in at. Headhunter to everybody. If you have any question or suggestion then just comment below or contact us. Yes, as a matter of fact I have. Uncle Monty: I can never touch raw meat until it's cooked. My partner's got a really good idea for making dolls. What good's the side? Withnail: Here."" (Richard Griffiths) "Laisse-moi, respirer . [reading the note] [to Marwood] Oh dear no no No, I'd be sucked into his trap! Withnail: Hello? Marwood: His head must weigh fifty pounds on its own. 4 Mar. Policeman 2: Withnail: DRIVE WITH EXTREME CARE", shouts out of the car window at a man standing on the pavement, Withnail and Marwood are lying in bed together, listening to a man coming inside the cottage. Withnail: Marwood: I dislike relatives in general and in particular mine. [the bedroom door slowly opens and the intruder enters with a torch] Withnail: [screwing his eyes shut in terror, moaning] We mean no harm! He's an expert. It's a part I intend to play, Uncle. Forgive me, it was inconsiderate of me not to have telegrammed. He says he won't come in for lunch without an apology. How like an angel in apprehension! Withnail and I is a 1986 film comedy written and directed by Bruce Robinson and starring Richard E. Grant (Withnail), Paul McGann (Marwood, the "I" of the title), Richard Griffiths (Uncle Monty) and Ralph Brown (Danny). You've got soup. Marwood: [pulling a pheasant out of his coat] [narrating over scene] Marwood: Just think of it with bacon across its back. We want to get in there, don't we? He's a madman. And the Coalman looks at him and says "You think *you* look normal, your honour?" The Coalman had to go to Jamaica. Oh my boys, my boys, we are at the end of an age! Because I don't advise it. You want working on, boy! Now, come along, I'm going to teach you how to peel a potato. Chin-chin. The only people he converses with are his clients and occasionally the police. Now, which of you is going to be a splendid fellow and go down to the Rolls for the rest of the wine? Oh, look at this little bastard. I'm starving. All hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Especially that little pimp! And now I'm calling you one. Withnail: Withnail: Withnail: I must go home at once and discuss his problems in depth. Withnail: Withnail: My wife is having a baby. Even a stopped clock gives the right time twice a day And for once I'm inclined to believe that Withnail is right We are indeed, drifting into the arena of the unwell making an enemy of our own future What we need is harmony, fresh air, stuff like that. Monty: "Withnail and I Quotes." withnail. An old woman with a clunky hearing aid pinned to her apron opens the door]. Marwood: We get in there and get wrecked, then we eat a pork pie, then we drop a couple of Surmontil-50s each. Withnail: I feel dreadful, I feel really dreadful. I assure you I'm not [drunk], officer, honestly. It'll happen. Rubbish. Shat on by Tories, shovelled up by Labour. share. Those are the kind of windows faces look in at. Belongs to the fellow downstairs. All right, Miss Blennerhassett, I'm warning you, if you do, you're fired. It's you he wants. Let him get his drugs out. Jake: Now look, you. We want the finest wines available to humanity. Withnail freezes in terror with a mouthful of pie]. Oh, Baudelaire. Withnail: Danny: You're looking very beautiful, man. We're not from London! We've just run out of wine. Maybe he's written this in some moment of drunken sincerity! Monty: I've already put two shilling pieces in. Press J to jump to the feed. You undo your valve and give them a dose of unadulterated child's piss and they have to give you your keys back. At some point or another I want to stop and get hold of a child. The thermostats. An expert on bulls you are not! [a few minutes later, Withnail re-enters the cottage holding a wet stick]. The school in fiction Poetry. It's obsessed with its gut. Withnail: Come on, old boy. So there's this judge sitting there in the cape like f***ing Batman with this really rather far out-looking hat. Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 1 - S01E04 High Diving Hare, Looney Tunes Golden Collection V.2 - S01E11 Tortoise Beats Hare, [SINGING] Hare Krishna, Hare Lama Hare Krishna, Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 1 - S01E08 Water, Water Every Hare, Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 1 - S01E37 Frigid Hare, Looney Tunes Golden Collection V.2 - S01E13 Slick Hare. I'm gonna be a sta-a-a-a-ar! The murder and All-Bran and rape. By the time the doors opened he was arseholed on rum and got progressively more arseholed until he could take no more and fell over at about 12 o'clock. 10 quotes from Withnail and I: the Original Screenplay: 'We are indeed drifting into the arena of the unwell.' . They're throwing themselves into the road gladly! You've got a rush. Do you realise this gaff's overrun with rodents? We live in a land of weather forecasts and breakfasts that set in. Withnail and I completed its run in 1970. You lead him astray. Look at that, accident black spot! These mom & son quotes will help you describe your love for him. Find *anything*. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Withnail: Survey of rural types. It will pass. Just you wait! DRIVE WITH EXTREME CARE"] I'm the firelighter and fuel collector. [gesturing at the wine bottles and Marwood in the back] It's the only solution to this intense cold. I don't advise a haircut, man. Withnail: Look at my tongue. Jake: Let go before it's too late or hang on and keep getting higher, posing the question: how long can you keep a grip on the rope? Nor women neither. [as Marwood walks past him] by Anonymous: reply 16: February 3, 2021 10:58 PM: I've gone on holiday by mistake. How dare you call me inhumane! Headhunter to his friends. There's the supper. Marwood: [eating chips while taking a bath] Ive got your saveloy. This suit was cut by Hawkes of Savile Row. We are indeed drifting into the arena of the unwell. I'm preparing myself to forgive you. Flowers are essentially tarts. Throwing themselves into the road gladly to escape all this hideousness. Withnail unfolds the note and hands it to Monty. Evidently country people are no more receptive to strangers than city-dwellers. report. Rejuvenate? Two out-of-work actors -- the anxious, luckless Marwood and his acerbic, alcoholic friend, Withnail -- spend their days drifting between their squalid flat, the unemployment office and the pub. Look at my tongue, it's wearing a yellow sock. Don't get uptight with me, man. Speed, is like a dozen transatlantic flights without ever getting off the plane Time change. Irishman: These aren't mine, they belong to him. Just because the best tailoring you've ever seen is above your fucking appendix doesn't mean anything! For reasons I can't really discuss with you, he had to go to Jamaica. Why have you drugged their onions?! The only people he converses with are his clients, and occasionally the police. The bastard's about to run at me! I feel dreadful, I feel really dreadful. I demand to have some booze! Add spice to it. [seeing a road sign reading "ACCIDENT BLACK SPOT. Quite freaked me at the time. But I never really had it in my blood, and that's what's so essential, isn't it, theatrical zeal in the veins. Withnail: All right, this is the plan. I don't want to hear anything. I want something's flesh! [in a telephone box, speaking to an operator] Monty: God fulfils himself in many ways. What the fuck are you talking about? Best kill it quick before it tries to make friends with us. If your father was my father you wouldn't get it. I do. Withnail: Good old Jake. Oh no, we'd be sucked into his trap! Withnail: Listen to this. Let him get his drugs out. Withnail: You can stuff it up your arse for nothing and f*** off while you're doing it! Just say there are a couple of drunks in the Penrith tearooms and we want them removed. Monty: Withnail: [fondling the money Monty has given them to buy Wellingtons] 1 comment. The greatest decade in the history of mankind is over. Marwood: Withnail: The fuel and wood situation. How right you are, how right you are. Headhunter to everyone. I've always been fond of root crops but I only started to grow last summer. Withnail: I would say. [Withnail sees Marwood eating some brownish fluid out of a bowl with a spoon] This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight. We live in a kingdom of reigns, where royalty comes in gangs. Course you have, you're the poacher. I tell you, I've a f*** sight more talent than half the rubbish that gets on television. [after having entirely covered himself in muscle embrocation to keep warm] Your sensitivity overwhelms me. Withnail: Change down, man. Withnail: Half an hour? He's building the prototype now. Marwood: There are are things in there; there's a teabag growing! Street: the embalmer. Street: The Embalmer! [Marwood comes out of the bathroom wearing a towel]. It's like Greenland in here. Withnail: You've had an audition. I have a heart condition. Now, what makes you think I should give you something for your pot? Search, discover and share your favorite Withnail And I GIFs. Well, lick 10 percent of the arses for me, then! - Washington Irving. Marwood: Jake The Poacher: I been watching you, 'specially you, up on them moors prancing around like a tit. Withnail: I know where you are, you're at Crow Crag. The purveyor of rare herbs and proscribed chemicals is back. One of my favourite movies. This boy's been out there frozen to the marrow and you just sit in here drinking. I must be ill. Withnail: Right, you f***er, I'm going to do the washing up. Uncle Monty: Sherry? Marwood: Especially that pimp! [is being arrested for drunk driving] Nonsense. Withnail: I'm utterly arseholed. But now he's stopped he's much better in our sex life and in our general life." [ripping Withnail's tartan scarf off his neck] Marwood: I'll swallow it and run a mile! Find your neutral space. Calm down. The movie, which takes place in England in late 1969, involves the misadventures of a pair of chronically unemployed actors. Withnail: I think we better release you from the lgume, and transfer your talents to the meat. Withnail: If I ever see that silage-heap hanging about up here, I'll take the bastard axe to him. How *dare* you! Withnail: Sulking up the hill. *Bastards*! [voiceover] Danny: It takes away your appetite just looking at it. And that's why you mustn't hold back, let it ruin your youth as I nearly did over Eric. Marwood: Withnail, you bastard, wake up. You haven't slept in sixty hours, you're in no state to tackle it. Anyway, I loathe those Russian plays. Withnail: Tactical necessity. Withnail: No you won't, you're not leaving me in here alone. This is a court, man. That's politics, innit? Withnail: Marwood: Suits me. He leans up close to her, speaking into to her hearing aid]. I've no idea. Marwood: Marwood: Apart from a raw potato, that's the only solid to have passed my lips in the last 60 hours. How dare you. Marwood: Why don't you wash up occasionally like any other human being? I took drugs to win medals says top athlete Geoff Woade.". Gi' me one in t' knee. Uncle Monty: Here hare here here hare here! So, there's this judge sitting there in a cape like fucking Batman with this really rather far-out looking hat. Withnail: (Ranting on a mountain) Bastards! Monty: 1 likes. Why don't I get any soup? You want working on, boy. No fridges, no televisions, no phones! Withnail: Hold on, don't let your imagination run away with you Marwood: Imagination! [the bedroom door slowly opens and the intruder enters with a torch]. Withnail: I didn't think he'd come all this way. Talk:Withnail and I. He told me about your problems. Call Of Duty 4 Modern Warfare: War Quotes - YouTube www.youtube.com. A self-sustained nicotine-yellow and fly-blown lung. Withnail: Marwood: And I'm sitting in this bloody shack and I can't cope with Withnail. Monty: I could hardly piss straight with fear. And how dare you tell him you rejected me?! I'm in considerable danger here, I must get out of here at once. Hello? Withnail: Withnail: It's a bloody chicken! Here are found the emeralds, sapphires, carbuncles, topazes, chrysolites, onyxes, beryls, sardius, and other costly stones. Danny: Uncle Monty: It is the most shattering experience of a young man's life when one morning he awakes and quite reasonably says to himself, "I will never play the Dane.". Withnail: Hairs are your aerials. Withnail: 'Scuse me. We are multimillionaires. Danny: Hey, show no fear! You love him. Danny: [high-pitched voice] Withnail and I Quotes. You wouldn't spike me, you're too mean. you little traitors. How dare you tell him I'm a toilet trader?! I was gonna cook onions. It was like walking into a lung. Jesus Christ, this huge, thatched head with its earlobes and cannonball is now considered sane. I can never touch meat until it's cooked. [they stop and look at each other. Withnail: That's what you'd say, but that wouldn't wash with Geoff. Are you the farmer? This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight. This *is* the morning. It's wearing a yellow sock. Sinew in nicotine base. He's so mauve, we don't know what he's planning! Maybe he's written this in some moment of drunken sincerity. [voiceover] No, no, you can't. Balls! Oh, Christ almighty. Monty: Marwood: Marwood stands there, petrified, the bull is scraping the ground with its front hoof, snorting, he throws the shopping the air and it scatters in the mud. A coward you are, Withnail, an expert on bulls you are not! Withnail: How should I possibly know what we should do? Why doesn't he retire? That is an unfortunate political decision. Danny: You can never, never disguise it. [referring to the radish on Monty's lapel] To tutor it in the ways of righteousness, and procure some uncontaminated urine. There can be no true beauty without decay. And indeed it goes so heavily with my disposition that this goodly frame, the earth, seems to me a sterile promontory. "I'm going to pull your head off." What happened to my cigar commercial? It's got to warm up. Danny: How infinite in faculties! Danny: [Withnail picks up a bottle of lighter fluid]. Finally, the Withnail And I script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the Richard E. Grant movie. Be seated. Man delights not me. Danny: The movie, which ta. Balls! Give me a downer, Danny. What happened to your cigar commercial? Haven't seen Gielgud down the labour exchange! Marwood: My thumbs have gone weird! Monty: Listen, I pay you 10 percent to do that. These eels here are for his pot. We're doing a feature for Country Life. Withnail: We're incompatible. Goes into court in his kaftan and a bell. An old woman with a clunky hearing aid pinned to her apron opens the door, she still doesn't answer. ", Oh! Don't suppose you've engaged, have you? [Mr Parkin is sitting on his tractor with one leg wrapped from thigh to ankle in a plastic fertiliser bag. Got a bit carried away. I wouldn't drink that if I was you. Cos if you do, I'll have to give you a dose of medicine. Required fields are marked *. There is, you'll agree, a certain 'je ne sais quoi' oh so very special about a firm, young carrot. Then they must be delighted with your career. And you'd be marvellous. I don't consciously offend big men like this. Withnail: Change down, man. There's nothing out there except a hurricane. I'm in a park and I'm practically dead; what good's the countryside? I adore you. That means we'll miss out on Monday but come up smiling Tuesday morning. Marwood: withnail magazinweb. [Heckles pedestrian] Throw yourself into the road, darling, you haven't got a chance! Marwood: [whispering] Withnail: You want me to call what's-his-name and ask him about his house? I want something's flesh! I feel unusual. Danny: Imagine getting into a fight with the f***er! Because if you do, I'll have to give you a dose of medicine. According to these instructions, you refuse everything but a urine sample. Four floors up on the Charing Cross road and never a job at the top of them. Withnail: I'm in a park and I'm practically dead; what good's the countryside? Danny: I dont advise a haircut, man. Bastard asked me to understudy Konstantin in The Seagull. Precisely the reason I'm smoking it. So, he looks at the Coalman and says "What's all this? This is a court, man. Here was a man with 3/4 of an inch of brain who'd taken a dislike to me. Nonsense, this is a far superior drink to meths! Probably wintering with his mother in Guildford. Withnail: These aren't accidents! Got busted coming back through Heathrow. Why can't I get on television? Burnt! Surrounded by trees and nature one feels a *glorious* stirring on the senses, a rejection of *poisonous* inhibition, and a *fecund* motion of the soul. My heart's beating like a f***ed clock! Withnail: Throwing themselves into the road to escape all this hideousness! The poets represented in the book include the Old Wykehamists John Crommelin-Brown, Lord Alfred Douglas, Robert Ensor, A. P. Herbert, George Huddesford, Lionel Johnson, William Lipscomb, Robert Seton-Watson, Thomas Adolphus Trollope . Who f***s arses? No need to get uptight, man. [approaching the pub] This ain't fancy dress." Nothing that reasonable members of society demand as their rights! If I hear more words out of you, I'll put one of these here black pods on you. We mean no harm! "Here. [ruefully] No fridges, no televisions, no phones. You will make it low. And we want them here, and we want them now! Withnail is walking him to the station in the heavy rain]. [during dinner] [the drunken, elderly pub landlord opens the till and it hits it him the chest and he almost falls down]. Followed by yet another anecdote about his sensitive crimes in a punt with a chap called Norman who had red hair and a book of poetry stained with the butter drips from crumpets. Oh, but how dreadful. Quotes.net. I've got a bastard behind the eyes. We can't go on like this. His sister give him the idea. It's too hot so he drops it, on top of a hill, shouting into a valley, his voice echoing, Withnail's lonely, aging homosexual uncle Monty has gone home, leaving a note humbly apologising for the desperate sexual advances he made on Marwood the night before, Jake has left a dead hare hanging on the cottage door, along with a note, wakes up in the back seat of the car, which is moving along the motorway, he swerves dangerously through the motorway traffic, holding up a Fairy Liquid bottle with a strap and a tube, Marwood knocks on the door of a farmhouse. Indeed, I remember my first agent. He used to pick on me. Ah! Withnail: The thermostats! [Withnail's lonely, aging homosexual uncle Monty has gone home, leaving a note humbly apologising for the desperate sexual advances he made on Marwood the night before]. That means we'll miss out on Monday but come up smiling Tuesday morning. This may be the reason bald-headed men are uptight. extends arm with umbrella straight up to sky, seeing a road sign reading "ACCIDENT BLACK SPOT. We've gone on holiday by mistake. I'm in the middle of a bloody overdose! You're looking very beautiful, man. Withnail: Right you f***er, I'm going to do the washing up! Dead down the drain? Here is the clip. Excuse me, we were wondering if we could purchase a pheasant off of you? Marwood: No we're not, we're here. Marwood: Sulking up the hill. Marwood: Stop saying that, Withnail, of course he's the f***ing farmer! We worked out it would be handy karma for him to get hold of a suit but he's a very low temperature spade, the Coalman. Trying for even more advantage. Withnail: A Massachusetts man was sentenced to probation for running an illegal hare trapping operation in Maine. Always full of women staring out of windows, whining about ducks going to Moscow. Outvie him. I had to come. Withnail: Uncle Monty: Oh! Withnail: I don't consciously offend big men like this. Burnt! Not the attitude I'd been given to expect from the H.E. He gags and gasps]. Because if you do, I'll have to give you a dose of medicine. You merely imagined it. Peter Marwood (I): Stop saying that Withnail, of course hes the fucking farmer! He winces as he stretches his leg]. [with his mouth full] If you think you're going to have a weekend's indulgence up here at his expense, which means him having a weekend's indulgence up here at my expense, you got another thing coming. He wants to get down there and have sex with those cows. Danny: 'He used to get in bad tempers and act up,' said his wife. This is a far superior drink to meths. Hare. Monty: 2 quotes have been tagged as withnail-i: Bruce Robinson: 'We've gone on holiday by mistake' and Bruce Robinson: 'Here. Marwood: The greatest decade in the history of mankind is over. We'll buy this place and have it knocked down! I've told you why. Marwood: I don't want to hear it. We are not drunks, we are multi-millionaires! How noble in reason! I'm not gonna understudy anybody. Oh, you little traitors. Withnail: Well neither have I. [pulling some goo out of the sink] My heart's beating like a fucked clock! [sticking out his yellowy tongue] What should we do? General: Danny: When I strike they won't know what hit them! Withnail: *Get-in-the-back-of-the-van*! You have done something to your brain. It won't be the first time I've been left with the couch. We shall buy this place and fire you immediately. Offer him yourself. Withnail: Night must fall and we shall be forced to camp. No, I haven't got another. I'm not going to understudy anybody. Uncle Monty: Here hare here here hare here! Now, come along, Im going to teach you how to peel a potato., I must have some booze. The only programme I'm likely to get on is the fucking news. Look at me, I'm 30 in a month and I've got a sole flapping off my shoe. Monty: Hair are your aerials. They're selling hippie wigs in Woolworth's, man. Voila! Tell him if you must, I no longer care. There is a hare tied to the door with a note attached. "Geoff Woade is feeling better and is now prepared to step back into society and start tossing his orb about." I've only had a few ales. He'd like a bit of pleading. I was merely making an observation. Chin-chin. Marwood: Danny: I happened to be looking for a suit for The Coalman two weeks ago. [Marwood knocks on the door of a farmhouse. There can be no true beauty without decay. It's like great yellow sock. When they take a holiday "by mistake" at the country house of Withnail's flamboyantly gay uncle, Monty, they encounter the unpleasant side of the . General: I can never touch meat until it's cooked. An expert on bulls you are not! Prostitutes for the bees. Withnail: Have you been at the controls? Marwood: Look here, my cousin's a QC! Cunt gave him two years. I happen to be the proprietor. Withnail: Stop saying that! 'He used to pick on me. We can't go on like this. Marwood: Making an enemy of our own future. No it doesn't. You got a rush. Plot - Withnail and "I" - the narrator - are two aspiring actors and friends who are looking for a job in London without success. Jake: Imagine the size of his balls. You want me to call whatshisname and ask him about his house? I think you've been punished enough. [removing his sunglasses] reading, studying, and reflecting this history have led to this moment. Monty: Well, of course you dont, you are incapable of indulging in anything but pleasure, am I not right? Easy for you to say, luvvie, you've had an audition. We want them here and we want them now! I tried not to. Marwood: Uncle Monty: Get that damned little swine out of here! Time change. And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust? Withnail: You hold it down, I'll strangle it. [screwing his eyes shut in terror, moaning] I feel like a pig shat in my head! Get any more masculine than him and you'd have to live up a tree. [Withnail laughs hysterically and falls to the floor, then vomits on Marwood's feet], Withnail: I think the carrot infinitely more fascinating than the geranium. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts . Honestly. Half an hour? I need at least an hour for lunch. Jesus Christ. Any minute now he's going to rush out and get into his tights. Danny's here. Look at this - accident blackspot? "I'm gonna pull your head off because I don't like your head.". I know you're not asleep, boy. Withnail: Well, don't. Withnail: Withnail: What are you doing up here, then? [he pours the lighter fluid down his throat. withnail and i 96119 GIFs. the web and also on Android and iOS. It has felt like listening to a symphony and here comes the crescendo. Withnail: No you can't, I can't get my boots on when they're hot. Withnail: Peter Marwood (I): We want the finest wines available to humanity! Oh God, it's a nightmare, I tell you, it's a nightmare. Danny: It's society's crime, not ours. [lunges towards the sink] [he throws the shopping the air and it scatters in the mud. Withnail: Listen, we're bona fide. Will we never be set free? They can handle the caftan but they cannot handle the bell. It is a bond filled with trust, unconditional love, understanding, and support. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. [pointing an eel at him] Politics, man. I have just narrowly avoided having a buggering, and have come in here with the express intention of wishing one upon you. Here hare here!" Bruce Robinson, Withnail and I: the Original Screenplay. The police, Miss Blennerhassett. I think there may be something living in there, I think there may be something alive. Grab its ring. [the bull is scraping the ground with its front hoof, snorting]. He says he won't come in for lunch without an apology. Danny: I wondered if you could sell us some food. Sherry? Hey, give us a wheeze on that fag. [looking at a newspaper] Withnail: Bastard asked me to understudy Konstantin in The Seagull. What do you want in here? "Oh no, please, don't pull my head off." If you don't remember the sixties, don't worry neither did they. Withnail freezes in terror with a mouthful of pie, ripping Withnail's tartan scarf off his neck, Withnail suddenly runs out of the pub, so does Marwood, Marwood is in the pub toilets, after walking past a hulking Irishman who's called him a ponce, Withnail picks up a bottle of lighter fluid, he pours the lighter fluid down his throat. Here grows the plant Assidos, which, when worn by any one, protects him from the evil spirit, forcing it to state its business and name; consequently the foul spirits keep out of the way there. These aren't accidents, they're throwing themselves into the road! Sort of said it without thinking. That's worse than meths! Here hare here? It's like a bloody rugby ball now, it will die, it will die! Got busted coming back through Heathrow. It has voodoo qualities. Sherry? You won't keep us anywhere. Danny: Monty: [they've arrived at the cottage, it's cold and dark]. Withnail and I is a 1986 film comedy written and directed by Bruce Robinson and starring Richard E. Grant (Withnail), Paul McGann (Marwood, the "I" of the title), Richard Griffiths (Uncle Monty) and Ralph Brown (Danny). Withnail: [whispering] He's going into your room. I'll sleep here. [Withnail suddenly runs out of the pub, so does Marwood], [Marwood is in the pub toilets, after walking past a hulking Irishman who's called him a ponce]. "Here, Hare, Here" -Monty (responding to rabbit nailed to door . Danny: Marwood: Add spice to it. Withnail: What have you found? Marwood: And all at once those frozen hours, melt through the nervous system, and seep out the pores. Danny: Jake: Sons are the anchors of a mother's life. He doesn't have any friends. Monty: One of us has got to stay on guard. Withnail: Rejuvenate! Have you had any training in the martial arts? Half dead he may be, but I'll come up after you, and I'll wake you up with a live one. Monty: We forgot to bring our Wellingtons. No more than you have. [he pulls Withnail's cigarette out of his mouth and puts it in his]. Monty: [wakes up in the back seat of the car, which is moving along the motorway] Wait till the morning, we'll go in together. You know what we should do? Danny: Don't get uptight with me, man. Armed with this splendid script, Richard E. Grant executes a tour de force as a relentlessly angry-at-the-world unemployed actor and raging alcoholic. Where did you school? Yeah, I know that, you've got to kill it. I don't know what's in here. This most excellent canopy, the air, look you, this brave o'erhanging firmament, this majestical roof fretted with golden fire, why, it appeareth nothing to me but a foul and pestilent congregation of vapors! Right, now we're going to have to approach this scientifically. Stop saying that, Withnail, of course he's the fucking farmer! Marwood: Alas I have little more than vintage wine and memories. Director: Bruce Robinson Stars: Richard E. Grant, Paul McGann, Richard Griffiths Rating: Unrated Runtime: 107 minutes Withnail and I is a 1986 film comedy written and directed by Bruce Robinson and starring Richard E. Grant (Withnail), Paul McGann (Marwood, the "I" of the title), Richard Griffiths (Uncle Monty) and Ralph Brown (Danny). I demand to have some booze!. Hare. "In a world exclusive interview, 33 year old shot putter Geoff Woade who weighs 317 pounds, admitted taking massive doses of anabolic steroids, drugs banned in sport. But old now, old. I'm a trained actor reduced to the status of a bum. Withnail: How dare you tell him that?! Stop saying that, Withnail! I been watching you, especially you, prancing like a tit. Withnail: "GET IN THE BACK OF THE VAN!" "I feel like a pig shat in my head." "Don't threaten me with a dead fish." "A coward you are, Withnail. We're working on a film up here. Marwood: I didn't call you inhumane. Tea Shop Proprietor: Withnail: Free to those who can afford it, very expensive to those who can't.